What makes a good single woman?

Traditionally, that answer was easy. A good single woman was a virgin who covers up but has fiery eyes that can ignite a man with passion and wide hips as a show of her empregnability. This cow like view of a woman is generally (but not everywhere) considered outdated. But still in most countries there are double standards for how men / women should behave in order to be considered “good”. In too many cultures a woman is thought less respectful if she wears too much make-up, too short a dress, drinks too much, shags too many or a random combination the previous factors.

I have a good friend who had shagged 50 men by the age of 28 and was not embarrassed to say it. And no, that wasn’t me. For her, sex was just fun and uncomplicated and something to do. Does that make her less of a good woman? I later saw her in a long-term relationship: always faithful, impeccable house, amazing food, supportive to her man. But surely somewhere in there there was the pontential for betrayal, some of you may be thinking. I would say just as much as for a traditionally “good woman”, because my friend knew the opposite gender and their ways well enough to dodge idiots and liers and fraudsters, and also because she chose her man among many others in full knowledge.

The worth of a woman, or of a man for that matter, can be better judged by:

– from what depths does your laughter come when you are with her?

– is she there for her family and friends?

– is she responsible with work and children and animals?

– does she respect herself above all things and no matter what obstacles she faces?

– does she get back up and keep up a good fight after she’s been hurt?

– is she loving and caring without being weak?

– does she express fear or positivism most of the time? Good vibes or bad vibes?

– does she see you for who you are and love you anyway?

If so, she is a good woman. If not, maybe she is less so. Regardless of how many men she slept or did not sleep with. Regardless of the length of the dress she is wearing now.

Worthiness is not measured by the following of rules. Especially not by the following of your rules. Worthiness is something that is further within. A moral quality that is immaterial in nature.


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